20 3 / 2019

duckbunny:

justanothermarvelblog11212:

What if humans are the only species with teeth?

Human: Struggling with wrapping on ration pack.

Alien: Do you require assistance human Andy?

Andy: (With a mouth full of plastic) Na I’ve got it.

Riiiiippppp

See?

Alien: Loses her shit.

*****

Alien looking at a caramel apple: Soooo you eat this?

Human: Yes we love them!

Alien: But they’re so hard. How do you consume them?

Human: Well yeah sometimes people do break teeth on them.

Alien: I’m sorry you can break your mouth bones on them but you eat them anyway!!??!

Human (Already biting into it): Mhuh.

*****

Evil alien: We have you now human!

Human: OH HELL NO YOU UGLY LITTLE SHITS YOU AINT GOT ME YOU THINK HUMANS ARE EASY TO KILL YOU’VE GOT ANOTHER THING COMING YOU…

Evil alien captain: Shut it up will you!

Evil alien: Yes sir OWWWW!

Evil alien captain: What just happened?!!? WHY IS THE HUMAN ESCAPING!!!?!!??

Evil alien: Humans have mouth bones.

Evil alien captain: ARE YOU KIDDING ME WHY DO HUMANS HAVE MOUTH BONES??!!!!???

human: yeah we had to invent cooking because our teeth are kinda small and useless. look *bares teeth*

alien, already disturbed by these peculiar soft endoshelled creatures: cool. cool. so uh just out of interest what do big, useful teeth look like?

-later-

alien, to her friends: AND THEN THEY SHOWED ME A THING CALLED A PET DOG AND I DID NOT LIKE IT

(via majestic-space-dragon)

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